Elmodemon

Elmo News

2008-04-09T10:06:00.001-07:00

At last check Elmo was still rediculously annoying!

In other Elmo news, the evil red menace will sing a duet with popular(?) singer/songwriter Feist on Sesame Street. (Who the hell is Feist? Sure it isn't Faust)

Feist was in New York this week taping an episode where she duets with Elmo. The two sing a song she wrote specifically for herself and the loveable, ticklish, furry guy. An air date hasn't been set.

(Story Link Below)
http://www.chartattack.com/damn/2008/04/0406.cfm

Elmo Podcast

2008-04-03T12:29:00.000-07:00

Fun Facts on Elmo

2008-04-02T10:50:00.000-07:00

As we anxiously await this week’s podcast Q & A featuring Elmo, here are some fun and little know facts about our furry yet infuriating little friend.

Elmo’s parents are named Gladys and George but they are rarely if ever seen on the show. He also has grandparents and he has a sister.

Elmo has been on many television specials, including Martha Stewart, Emeril and even testified before congress to urge support of music education and other shows.

Name: Elmo Monster

Scientific Name: Furrius childus, a.k.a Painus in the Assis

Age: 3 1/2 years

Birthday: February 3

Best Friends: Zoe and Grover

Religion: Atheist

Favorite Songs: Elmo's Song, Runnin’ with The Devil (Van Halen) and It’s Getting Hot in here (Nellie)

Quote: "That tickles!", "Elmo loves you!", “Kill James,” “Elmo wants your Soul”

Dislikes: Brussel Sprouts, Exorcisms

Higher Power: Satan

Muppeteer: Kevin Clash, Satan

Favorite Hobbies: piano, violin, tap dancing, capitalism, demonic possession

First appearance on Sesame Street: 1984

Pet: Dorothy (the goldfish) and various chickens, lambs and other small animals used in Satanic rituals

Most popular Elmo item: Tickle Me Elmo

Favorite food: pizza and Really HOT Wings

Favorite fruit: banana and the Forbidden Fruit

Favorite game: Tag, Ring around the Burning Christian

Favorite sports: Rollerblading, Miniature golf and the Devil’s Pitchfork Toss (Similar to the javelin throw) but with Christians used as targets.

Elmo Q & A

2008-03-28T07:55:00.000-07:00

Don't miss next week's edition of Point. No Point.

Host Guy Smiley will have an exclusive Q & A with Elmo. Smiley, known for his no nonsense brand of journalism, will ask the tough questions we've all wanted to ask this larger than life figure but were to afraid to.

Log on, and you'll learn Elmo's favorite color. . . .Elmo's . . . favorite pig out food?

And, Elmo will answer the question that's beeen haunting us all.......Is it Coke or Pepsi, Elmo?

Until we meet again, remember.....Elmo Loves you Very Much!

2008-03-26T13:45:00.000-07:00

EvilLittleMonsterO

It was a sight I will never forget. A moment that changed my life forever.

It all started one day in the freezer aisle at a supermarket. My wife and I were strolling past the ice cream case when we heard our 1-year-old start yelling Elmo..Elmo . . . Elmo!!

Surprised, we looked around to see what was causing the fuss. Then Emma, mesmerized and spellbound, pointed upwards as she continued what now had become an almost ritualistic chant…Elmo…Elmo . . Elmo!!!

I slowly raised my head in the direction of her tiny little fingers. And, there it was,. . . lurking ominously above our head, its demonic eyes piercing deep into my soul, its mouth frothing with anticipation. Shivers ran down my spine.

I was looking square into the eyes of evil!!

Actually, it was a giant Elmo balloon, gently swaying above the ice cream freezer.

“How did she know who Elmo was,” my wife asked. I, still shaking from my terrifying encounter, struggled for an answer. (Pardon me, this is still hard to talk or write about).

I knew what was happening. This was no ordinary encounter with a wildly popular Sesame Street character. No, my friends… this was the fateful day that Elmo took our soles. I’m talking about….. Demonic ELMO Possession, a.k.a DEP.

Don’t be fooled by the squeaky little red fur ball. He doesn’t need a hug. He needs your SOUL!

He’s a BEAST I tell you!!!!!!! A BEAST!!!!

Repeat after me:
The power of Christ compels you, The power of Christ compels you!

Since that ecounter, gone are the days of watching sports on TV. Now it’s Elmo’s World, Elmo in Grouchland, Elmo Save Christmas. Elmo…Elmo… Elmo!!

Now my daughter has Elmo slippers, Elmo toothbrushes, Elmo pajamas, Elmo cups, Elmo dishes, Elmo shirts, Elmo hats, and an Elmo backpack to hold her stuffed Elmos and various other Elmo collectibles.

The list is endless

She even has her very own Elmo chair so she can comfortably watch Elmo’s World, Elmo in Grouchland, Elmo Save Christmas over…..and over…and over AGAIN!

Believe me my friends, DEP is real, and it can happen to you.

If you don’t believe me, read the following:

http://elmo-death-threat.blogspot.com/

http://www.engadget.com/2008/02/22/when-good-toys-go-bad-x-elmo-makes-death-threats-to-toddler/

Perhaps you too can share some horrifying Elmo stories.

Melo