Friday, March 28, 2008

Elmo Q & A

Don't miss next week's edition of Point. No Point.

Host Guy Smiley will have an exclusive Q & A with Elmo. Smiley, known for his no nonsense brand of journalism, will ask the tough questions we've all wanted to ask this larger than life figure but were to afraid to.

Log on, and you'll learn Elmo's favorite color. . . .Elmo's . . . favorite pig out food?

And, Elmo will answer the question that's beeen haunting us all.......Is it Coke or Pepsi, Elmo?

Until we meet again, remember.....Elmo Loves you Very Much!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

EvilLittleMonsterO

It was a sight I will never forget. A moment that changed my life forever.

It all started one day in the freezer aisle at a supermarket. My wife and I were strolling past the ice cream case when we heard our 1-year-old start yelling Elmo..Elmo . . . Elmo!!

Surprised, we looked around to see what was causing the fuss. Then Emma, mesmerized and spellbound, pointed upwards as she continued what now had become an almost ritualistic chant…Elmo…Elmo . . Elmo!!!

I slowly raised my head in the direction of her tiny little fingers. And, there it was,. . . lurking ominously above our head, its demonic eyes piercing deep into my soul, its mouth frothing with anticipation. Shivers ran down my spine.

I was looking square into the eyes of evil!!

Actually, it was a giant Elmo balloon, gently swaying above the ice cream freezer.

“How did she know who Elmo was,” my wife asked. I, still shaking from my terrifying encounter, struggled for an answer. (Pardon me, this is still hard to talk or write about).

I knew what was happening. This was no ordinary encounter with a wildly popular Sesame Street character. No, my friends… this was the fateful day that Elmo took our soles. I’m talking about….. Demonic ELMO Possession, a.k.a DEP.

Don’t be fooled by the squeaky little red fur ball. He doesn’t need a hug. He needs your SOUL!

He’s a BEAST I tell you!!!!!!! A BEAST!!!!

Repeat after me:
The power of Christ compels you, The power of Christ compels you!

Since that ecounter, gone are the days of watching sports on TV. Now it’s Elmo’s World, Elmo in Grouchland, Elmo Save Christmas. Elmo…Elmo… Elmo!!

Now my daughter has Elmo slippers, Elmo toothbrushes, Elmo pajamas, Elmo cups, Elmo dishes, Elmo shirts, Elmo hats, and an Elmo backpack to hold her stuffed Elmos and various other Elmo collectibles.

The list is endless

She even has her very own Elmo chair so she can comfortably watch Elmo’s World, Elmo in Grouchland, Elmo Save Christmas over…..and over…and over AGAIN!

Believe me my friends, DEP is real, and it can happen to you.

If you don’t believe me, read the following:

http://elmo-death-threat.blogspot.com/

http://www.engadget.com/2008/02/22/when-good-toys-go-bad-x-elmo-makes-death-threats-to-toddler/

Perhaps you too can share some horrifying Elmo stories.


Melo